MY FRIEND WANTS TO GO HUNTING

I have a friend who had never been an outdoorsy type person. As a matter of fact, he was an opera singer and music teacher. So, I invited him and his wife to go camping with us. They loved it. They enjoyed the camping and the fishing so much he decided he wanted to learn to hunt. But he didn't want to start off hunting rabbit or squirrel. NO SIR. He wanted to hunt BEAR with a bow and arrow! After all, it was more sporting that way. I told him he should talk to some of the older hunters and get pointers but he said absolutely not, that anybody who knows anything about any subject would have written a book and so off to the library he went. First thing he did after reading his book was purchase a compound bow. Then he bought a couple bales of hay and put a bulls eye on it so he could practice. Practiced faithfully all summer. Bought some kind of stuff that smelled like pee in a bottle. Bought camoflauge clothes. Had his wife wash them several times in plain water and hung them out on the line for over a week so they smelled like the great outdoors. Finally the time came for him to hunt. Took his brother-in-law with him. Set out in a testosterone rush. Saw a little black bear a couple hills over from where he was, pooped his pants, and climbed a tree. His wife said he brought his clothes home in a trash bag for her to wash. She threw them away. I didn't have the heart to tell him that bears can climb trees!